Saturday, January 15, 2005

It's been a long time since I posted to this blog. Where did the time go? 2005? It still sounds strange.

It is finally hitting me that one day my children will leave home. We started talking about where they will go to college and how we will pay for it. That's when it started seeming very real. I started going into anticipatory grief. I was miserable for several days until I prayed about it. I think God gave me the wisdom to realize that now is not the time for grieving. I should enjoy what is left of the time they will be with us. I'll cross that bridge when I get there and not sooner. It is not worth losing sleep over now.

My daughter bought an IPOD yesterday with money she earned at her job. I can't tell you how earth-shaking that seems to me. She is not dependent on me for all the money she has now. She can decide to spend $250 without consulting me. It seems like yesterday that she was a tiny baby with a toothless grin. Now she has a shiny metalic-braces smile. That is, when she smiles at me, which is less often than it used to be. She's a teenager, you know.